home spirituality my gospel knighted
home inspirational knighted

A Vision of being Knighted in 1993:

At a CREDO Personal Growth retreat, during a music set on a Friday evening, I felt like I went into a trance. Witnesses said I looked like I was having a heart attack, as I sat leaning back in my chair, looking up with my eyes closed, chest heaving rapidly.

I was aware of that, yet I was mesmerized by the scene played out before me. I was watching a knighting ceremony. A flame-like figure barely stood out against a flaming background and moved about. I could not make out the details, and noticed the scene being replayed, with the background lighting turned down.

Now I could recognize the flame-like figure as a regal one, as a divine one, as Jesus. He was reaching out toward me with a flaming sword, touching me on my shoulders, as if knighting me in a medieval ceremony.

I tried to cry out in protest, but merely thought the words, "I don't deserve this!" His gentle reply was, "Not because you deserve this, but because you need this."

Only hours later, a participant focused years of anger at his father at me. He called me out to the center of the room, and standing in front of me, only a few feet away, barely maintaining emotional control, he proceeded to talk about what his father had done.

I was amazingly calm throughout the tirade. In addition to being verbally abusive he was barely under control, physically tense. All I could remember going on in my mind was that phrase: "Not because you deserve this, but because you need this."

I could focus on the little boy in front of me, his pain, his heartache, his disappointment. I barely even felt his anger.

My team members later reported that they were afraid for me, believing he would strike at any minute, and amazed at my lack of concern for was poised to do at any minute. 

Their concerns were not without merit, as we have had team members be attacked from time to time as people got so into their pain that they forgot who was in front of them. It rarely happens, but when it does you tend to not forget it.

I then told my team members of the vision, and of how I was convinced I was totally safe, not because I deserved the safety, but because I needed it. This is a reason for me to call Him, "My provider."